Well, it's been about a week since I put my first entry on here. I've had a busy week finishing decorating our new home. It's taken 6 months to finish! That coupled with hospital appointments for my partner who is disabled and backwards and forwards to my parents who I alos care for, and still working on setting up my business and doing some costume making for a pub in burnley for their opening - I just haven't had time to write anything. But, I'm here now, it's Sunday morning, Neil's still in bed, and apart from the three cats, I'm on my own - BLISS! I do like quiet time on my own. I sit and think and commune with the world and the Big 'G'.
There is something I have thought about a lot in recent months which up until now, I have not commented on to anyone other than my partner and that is the murder of local girl Sophie Lancaster.
For those out there who do not know of her - I will give a brief synopsis of the story. She and her biyfriend were on their way home from a night out and were attacked by a group of youths - just for being 'different'. They were 'Goths'. The scum ( and I do mean SCUM) who did this are the lowest of the low. They brutally beat the pair into unconsciousness and both were left for dead in a local park here in Rossendale. Robert Maltby (Sophie's partner and fellow victim) fortunately survived the attack despite serious injuries. Sophie however, died later in hospital. My heart goes out to Sophie's parents and family, her boyfriend Robert and all those who knew this lovely girl. I can only imagine their devastation. And all this happened in my beautiful valley. Something I never dreamed possible.
But this is the way of the world these days - so they say. Well, we are ALL to blame for this. It is only this way because we allow it. This is NOT the way the world should be. But too many of us sit behind closed curtains and doors complaining of what goes on, but nobody (or very few) ever get up off their fat backsides and 'DO' anything about it! This country is full of 'good gonnas'. Those who are 'gonna do this' and 'gonna do that' but never actually do anything! There are lots of big mouths in Britain today willing to mouth off at every opportunity about the state of our nation. But that's all they do. Well I'm sorry, but mouthing off doesn't cut it anymore. If we are going to take back this country from the trash and yobs who are ruling our streets today - we all have to actually get off our arses and DO something.
As with many of these attrocities such as Sophie's story - the culprits are young people, who seems to have no respect for anyone or anything. Saying this, I do not want to label all young people with the same brush - as this would be unfair. I have worked with children and young people all my life and I know this isn't the case. I have worked with wonderful kids, but I have also worked with some dreadful ones. But I still believe there is no such thing as a bad child - just bad parents. Children need boundaries. They need discipline. Without it - they feel un-loved and insecure, and that's when they go off the rails!
When I was growing up we had discipline in schools. There was none of this 'political correctness' that said children should not be smacked. Parents were parents and not our friends. they only became your friends when you were grown, but even then - they were still parents. We didn't have gangs of teenagers roaming the streets terrorising everyone. If you gave cheek to a neighbour, you'd get a clip round the ear and they'd tell your dad and he'd give you another clip round the ear or worse!
Too many people are trying to be their children's friends and forgetting they need to be parents. Working with children all my life I've seen it time and time again. And children don't know where they are anymore. And they all know their 'rights' and use it to their advantage. Children should only have certain rights. They have the right to love, care and protection from the evils of the world and that is where their rights should stop. Parents should smack their children if they need to. No-one is saying anyone should beat their children. But a sound spanking when they've been really bad is needed.
Me and my siblings were terrified of my father growing up. We were scared to do anything wrong or we'd get a good hiding, but we knew we were loved and safe. At school we were scared to do anything wrong or we'd get the strap, or the cane. What have kids got now? A naughty step, detention or exclusion! Big deal! And that's what kids think too. They aren't afraid anymore and they should be. We are teaching our kids that there is nothing to fear and I'm sorry, but the world is a dangerous place and they need to know how to fear, for their own safety. Even animals smack their children. You watch a lioness with her cubs on a nature programme - if they are going 'too far' - she will smack them with her paw. She will not be brutal, just enough to warn the cub of danger and make it afraid.
Children are also being de-sensitised to so many things because a lot of parents let them watch tv in their rooms. How can you control tv in their rooms when you're not there? They will let them watch videos too old for them. I have been in people's homes where under fives have been watching horror films such as 'alien' and 'the ring'. I'm sorry, but if you are letting your child watch film like that - you are abusing your child in my book. Children need protection from parents like you!
Having children is not a right, it is a gift. And you are meant to nuture that gift and prepare them for adulthood, so they can go out into the world and be a decent human being. You are NOT meant to destroy their wonder or childhood by allowing them to see and do things that will damage them.
And parents also have to remember that they 'chose' to have kids, the rest of society should not have to 'put up with' your child's bad behaviour. Too many parents these days say; 'it's not my fault, I can't control them!' Well who's fault is it? It's your child - you are responsible - no-one else. If you cannot control your own children - then you have no business having them! And if you don't bring your children up right and control them so they behave well in the world, it could be your child that's up in court facing murder charges for the next Sarah Lancaster!